Found Serenity in TUGs/Bondage? [PG13]

[tiedinbluetights]

The question I initially wanted to ask was "do you feel safest while bound?" But that question was too one-sided for my taste, asking only from a captive or sub perspective. I'm actually interested from the perspective of both captor/top/Dom (do you feel most protective/caring/loving while keeping your captive/bottom/sub tied-up?) and captive/bottom/sub (do you feel most protected/cared for/loved while kept tied-up by your captor/top/Dom?).

I'm not side-tracking nor dismissing the inherent dangers in TUGs/bondage, especially when doing selfbondage, including the need for quick-release mechanisms or fail-safes in case of emergencies beyond our control (fire, earthquakes, ...). Those issues are always at the forefront of my thoughts.

Nevertheless, what I am getting at is that in my case, despite the inherent dangers of an activity I enjoy, so long as I practice it with people that I trust, like, care for, and they do the same, I feel very safe and cared for. I'm very fortunate to have found a life-time partner with whom I can practice TUGs safely. But this goes further back for me, all the way to my earliest childhood memories.

Basically: as a kid, I felt safest in my bedroom, under heavy bed sheets, and especially safest if under all that, I was tied-up in some way (preferably to the bed itself rather than just tied-up and able to roll off the bed). As an adult, I still feel that way.

Does anyone else? And it is more than just safety. I feel an inner peace, a calmness, when bound, with a loving/caring captor nearby. And even during selfbondage* games I've played, for lack of a partner, I always found a sense of serenity. Hence my broader question: have you found serenity in TUGs or bondage games?

*(side note: only twice while doing selfbondage, did I get "temporarily stuck", and yes I did panic, but eventually, as I allowed peace and calm to return, I was able to free myself--so I'm not dismissing the dangers and "negatives;" it's just that, for me, the positives have outweighed the negatives, and even helped me a couple of times to get out of a "bind").

[sami200456boyfriend]

Yes I do

[copperfox]

I wouldn’t characterize the feeling that I have while tied up as being “safe” or “protected”, though I definitely understand what you mean. Perhaps the closest to that feeling that I have is when I’m in a hogtie, gagged, with my head in my wife’s lap. It’s more an intense feeling of she gets me—or, really, we get each other. There’s a deep, fundamental connection there that I can’t really put into words…I just know how it feels.

For me, being in bondage is extremely relaxing, peaceful, therapeutic, and just plain comfortable (even when my muscles are screaming…I still don’t understand how that works). I guess the best way to describe it is this: Being tied up taps into a core and essential part of my being. When I’m tied up, I’m truly me—in a way that I’m just not in any other context or situation in life.

You mentioned that, as a kid, you felt safest when you were under heavy bed sheets. Have you ever (or do you) use weighted blankets when sleeping? I’ve often heard that they provide a similar hugging/restrictive feeling to being bound, though I’ve never actually used one myself.

[tiedinbluetights]

You mentioned that, as a kid, you felt safest when you were under heavy bed sheets. Have you ever (or do you) use weighted blankets when sleeping? I’ve often heard that they provide a similar hugging/restrictive feeling to being bound, though I’ve never actually used one myself.

Yep, I do use weighted blankets during the coldest months of winter. But they can easily be tossed aside so not as restrictive as the bondage I crave, but definitely more relaxing then when sleeping without bed sheets during the most humid summer months with no AC in the apartment