Stories of Tie Up Games

A new user, @romania, posted as their first post a very interesting question (viewtopic.php?t=24815), but have since decided to delete their question and post, adding yet another "." thread. I will try, from memory, to reformulate their question here as best as I can, and then reproduce my exact answer, here. Being curious as to potential answers myself, I'd hate to see this particular thread die.

So, from what I can recall, the gist of what user had asked, was (paraphrasing mine)

Given that many of us on this forum have very likely given thought to being bound during a holiday or birthday gathering, and some of us have even written stories about it, would any one of us truly and seriously be willing to spend the majority and most important part of a holiday/special occasion tied-up.

The user went on to give details about how this might (again, my paraphrasing from memory)

bring to light the true meaning of the restrictiveness of bondage and the power it holds as on one hand one gets to live out their dreams but on the other hand miss out on very important moments like the local rituals surrounding the special occasion as in midnight on New Year's Eve.

I also recall the user emphasizing

perfect conditions and no judgment on the part of all gathered.

So, much like that user, I'm curious myself what other's would say. My own answer is repeated in a follow-up post to this thread.

I really love this question, originally from @romania and here is my original response.

Given all the details that were brought (from memory, issues of power exchange, trust, missing out on key moments, yet having dreams fulfilled), combined with my own personal experiences and knowledge of myself, I'd have to say yes, most definitely, would still choose, willingly, to spend my birthday or some holiday in bondage. I would not consider it particularly tragic or having "missed out" if I would be happily bound and gagged (and have been for some time, and will be for more) during some key event like midnight on New Year's Eve or the cutting into a cake during my birthday.

To understand why, I cannot explain it better than via my earliest memory of all, literally my very first memory in my life, when I was just 4 or 5 years old, about which I wrote a story here: My 1st Time! Or was it? (m/m, then f+m+/m). I have to say that bondage is literally part of my core being and a necessary stress management and relaxation mechanism. When I get overly anxious, or stressed-out, a few hours bound and gagged does much more for me than an hour work-out at the gym (although both do wonders, the gym alone is not enough, and I'd quickly return to being a bundle of nerves the next day--only bondage alleviates my stress and anxieties for long enough, while the gym helps maintain the physical health necessary for the 'sport' of bondage).

Large gatherings cause me a great deal of anxiety, even if the people involved are trusted, caring friends (and I have more trusted, caring friends than relatives). Being able to put all my trust for my well-being into the hands of trusted, caring individuals is a powerful feeling for me--that's one of the many reasons bondage games are considered part of a wider power-exchange dynamic. There is, on my part, a deep seated need to be able to have utmost trust in people I care for deeply. There are also the relaxing, stress-abating feelings of being perpetually hugged and desired that being tightly bound provides me with. Being kept bound and gagged, yet deeply cared for, by a group of individuals during a holiday gathering would be a dream come true! All my worries and worldly concerns would melt away knowing I can totally trust everyone present. Unable to move or even speak, my focus would be only on what my own heightened senses would perceive, burning them permanently into memory: the delicious aromas of the food I cannot feed myself with; the joyous laughter and banter I cannot directly partake in, but still enjoy; and, if not blindfolded as well, the joyful smiles of beloved friends having a good time. If kept in a corner away from the main party, I'd be intoxicated with sweet anticipation: the sound of a person's approaching footsteps coming to check in on me; the smell of perfume or cologne of the one approaching me mingling with their own personal aromas from partying; the feel of a person's touch as they check the ropes and straps binding me, adjusting to ensure no cramping and circulation issues, and re-tightening anything that might have gotten too loose for my taste, all the while trusting that their hands would never wonder inappropriately beyond preset boundaries; the sweet sound of their voice and smell of their breath as they ask me how I'm doing; their musical giggles as they correctly interpret my muffled groans through my gag; and, if not blindfolded, their knowing smile as our gazes lock.

That said, since that early memory of mine, there have not been for me any other times during large gatherings of family members (just me and my wife in the intimacy of our own home--more about those further down). As we get older, all sorts of taboos and associations get mixed up with the simple game of being restrained. As I've commented on other threads on this forum to which I have lost the links, I wish we lived in a far more open-minded world that would comprehend that enjoyment of being bound and gagged is not necessarily for kinky or sexual reasons, but can be enjoyed in of itself, so long as it's practised with continually enthusiastic and informed consent, in a safe and sane, supportive and caring environment. There are probably some few very fortunate individuals out there that have an extended circle of very understanding friends, a chosen family, with whom large holiday gatherings can include some fun bondage for extended periods, but I don't see how such a thing will ever come to be a mainstream norm.

So while I wish and dream that I could have an extended circle of friends and family that would happily and caringly indulge my bondage fantasies during real-life holiday gatherings, I only ever have done holiday/birthday bondage with just my darling wife in the privacy and intimacy of our own home. Rather that repeat all the details, some (not all) of which can be found peppered throughout some of my stories (both fictionalized and true as I can remember) I've written on the site (see my profile text), I'll just mention that I have done a New Year's Eve once, where I was tied to a chair by my wife, for a couple of hour before midnight and we kissed while I was still tied to that chair at midnight. There was also once a planned birthday weekend where I was going to be kept tied-up in various positions all weekend log, but real-life intrusions turned it into just lasting a few hours on the day itself; at least I got feed some of my birthday cake, leading to a lot of laughter at the silliness of it all. And we also have a somewhat of a Halloween tradition (not an official holiday, but still a big deal in my corner of the world), which is best left to the true story I've written about it.

I hope my answer has provided some insight as to why some may indeed want to spend a holiday or birthday tied-up. All the best for the New Year to all you lovely folk on this site

I think that if an ipotetical girl simply spawn in front of me, asking me to tied her up, tickle all over her and gag her, for my birthday, i could probably be the happiest man alive

Gramshi wrote: 1 week ago I think that if an ipotetical girl simply spawn in front of me, asking me to tied her up, tickle all over her and gag her, for my birthday, i could probably be the happiest man alive

Fair enough The title of the thread could have been clearer (I'll edit it soon).

tiedinbluetights wrote: 1 week ago

Gramshi wrote: 1 week ago I think that if an ipotetical girl simply spawn in front of me, asking me to tied her up, tickle all over her and gag her, for my birthday, i could probably be the happiest man alive

Fair enough The title of the thread could have been clearer (I'll edit it soon).

My bad, the question was pretty clear now that i'm rereading it

This is such a cool question. I'm assuming from the stipulation of no judgment that it means you'll be bound actually at the gathering, rather than off in a different room somewhere.

There are some ones that I wouldn't want to miss, like Christmas. However, things like New Year's and birthday parties (and even better, small social gatherings) I really like the idea of being properly tied up and gagged for an extended period of time. I think being in the room, perhaps off to one side and blindfolded so I couldn't see or interact but could hear everything going on would be absolutely amazing.

Sheriff wrote: 6 days ago This is such a cool question. I'm assuming from the stipulation of no judgment that it means you'll be bound actually at the gathering, rather than off in a different room somewhere.

Yes, I believe that was the main point of the original question: bound out in the open, or off in a corner, in view of all (or at least most) of those gathered. That brings in another aspect I forgot to write in my own answer (already very long as it is -- apologies to those who prefer shorter posts), namely that all present can share in the huge responsibilities and cognitive load of looking after a bound submissive. It is a lot to handle for one person to look after their bound captive; add to that having to cater to a whole bunch of guests, and it quickly becomes dangerously insane. Having the guests consensually in on it and helping out would make the whole thing possible.

Special occasion gatherings also bring about issues with alcohol and drinking in general. Many of us have repeatedly stated on this forum that any amount of inebriation or intoxication is a no-go when it comes to tie-up games in real-life. Just as any group of responsible people would have one or more designated drivers for after the party, I could imagine such a party having a sub-group of designated sober "captors" to ensure the safety of the captive and that nothing goes beyond established boundaries.

Sheriff wrote: 6 days ago There are some ones that I wouldn't want to miss, like Christmas. However, things like New Year's and birthday parties (and even better, small social gatherings) I really like the idea of being properly tied up and gagged for an extended period of time. I think being in the room, perhaps off to one side and blindfolded so I couldn't see or interact but could hear everything going on would be absolutely amazing.

Agreed, and I would like to hear from anyone who has had such a wonderful experience in real life. I mean, I am aware of private-club gatherings in some large metropolitan areas (thinking of BDSM munches, and parties like the Femdom Ball), but here the emphasis would be more on a close-knit group of friends and/or open-minded relatives in the privacy of one's own home, on a special occasion everyone would normally celebrate, like Christmas and News Year Eve.

Curious to hear more thoughts, insights, and fait vécus

I missed the original question. Good one.

Depends on the people. I am a loner, and don't have that many friends (or generally people I want to spend time with). In case of such a party, in the open, so being tied up in the main room while the rest celebrates - yeah, I would. Maybe only gagged for some time, so I could talk to people, but the ones I would have there either know about my fetish (some I asked, if they would tie me up, but they declined, without judgement), or would very likely not judge me for it.

I mean, the reason why I wouldn't do it as is, is that it would make them uncomfortable. If that were not the case, sure, why not? I don't even see how I would miss out, when I'm in the main room anyway.

Alternatively, if I would be stuck in another room during a celebration (which was what I assumed was meant at first), for a wedding of someone else, or a big birthday party, or party general - immediately (if I trusted the other person, of course). Not even a question. I don't care for parties and large gatherings, and avoid them as good as I can. This would rather be a reason to go. Yes, I would hope that no one finds me, that could be awkward. But it would also be part of the fun.

Sheriff wrote: 6 days ago This is such a cool question. I'm assuming from the stipulation of no judgment that it means you'll be bound actually at the gathering, rather than off in a different room somewhere.

There are some ones that I wouldn't want to miss, like Christmas. However, things like New Year's and birthday parties (and even better, small social gatherings) I really like the idea of being properly tied up and gagged for an extended period of time. I think being in the room, perhaps off to one side and blindfolded so I couldn't see or interact but could hear everything going on would be absolutely amazing.

Would you rather that the other partygoers regularly tease and mock you as you sit there, or would you rather that they completely ignore you? Like, your captivity is so insignificant and normal to them that they don't even notice you there.

@G9Drox This is such a great follow-up question!

Being just left is really appealing, but I think I have to go for mocking, possibly with some humiliation and torture too. I like the idea that I'm part of the entertainment. So maybe I'd get tickled, be used as a footrest by the women, led on a lead, made to eat food out of a bowl on the floor etc.

@tiedinbluetights Agree that intoxication isn't a good idea with real-life sessions.

I think for a fantasy, though, the idea of everyone else getting tipsy while I'm like that is quite appealing. I like the idea of reduced inhibitions giving them the courage to up the ante with torture and my bindings.

@FelixSH I'm a loner myself, actually quite introverted, so I get the appeal of avoiding large gatherings and thus also being kept in another room during one, adding the fantasy thrill of possibly being found out by an unsuspecting guest.

However, I definitely would not myself participate if any attendee was uncomfortable with the idea. In real-life scenarios, I'm pretty big on continual enthusiastic consent of ALL involved, and that means not just having the consent of someone to be a bottom, but also being aware to not force topping onto people who have not explicitly and enthusiastically consented to such. So if it were to happen for me, it would only be with guests that new exactly beforehand that I would be kept tied-up and what the boundaries were, and they were all comfortable and even happy about that. At any point, if anyone, even any of the topping guests becomes uncomfortable, the whole thing stops. After all, the point of friends and family gatherings is for all to have an enjoyable experience.

@Sheriff To expand on the fantasy angle, I could imagine a scenario where to ensure that there are a sufficient number of designated drivers post-party, 'volunteered' designated drivers would be kept tied up and gagged for use after party. Another story idea (so many ideas, so little time and motivation to write stories)