My Lowest Point (F/M)
Posted: Sun Dec 15, 2024 1:03 pm
A true story, told from my perspective.
I love self bondage, for those of you who don't know, I love getting myself into stupid predicaments, and exposing myself helplessly to my partner. Because once I'm bound, she can do anything she likes to me, and sometimes she likes to really push me.
This time however, we both went too far... and I fucking loved it!
My Mistress doesn't tie me up terribly often, as she likes to save her creative ideas and energy for the big sessions we have. In the moment she is an outstanding Dominant that you wouldn't dare look twice at. But that's not her style every day of course.
So when I'm feeling randomly submissive (and a little adventurous) I will tie myself, and leave my fate in her hands. She may choose to play with me, or simply ignore me all together. All depending on how she's feeling that day. Though she does like to tease me fairly often, knowing that I can't stop her.
On this particular night she was pre-occupied with decorating her nails, while I was extremely amorous and ready to go. So naturally I decided I would self bind like usual to satisfy my urges. But the real question was how to make it interesting and new? I wanted to do something that I had never done before.
After sitting around thinking for a while it suddenly struck me. What if I gave myself a huge enema and tied myself to a chair in our bedroom. It might be an interesting challenge to see how long I can stop myself from spilling it. I thought to myself.
The only issue is that it may create a huge unwanted mess, so I decided a diaper would be a good idea just incase it all goes south (literally).
And just to be clear, I don't have a scat fetish, and I never want to see it. I just like heavy degradation. I know some people are into it, but it's not my cup of tea personally.
I told my partner what I was doing so that she knew the risk if she tried playing with me. And quite frankly I didn't expect her to touch me on this occasion because she hates everything dirty and messy, including watersports, unless she's the one pissing on me to show Dominance. Anyhow, I let her know that I had just inserted over a litre of water into my ass and that I was about to self bind. Her reply was simply, "Have fun".
I then proceeded to head into the bedroom where I started to get myself ready. I stripped naked and put a diaper on, followed by my purple PVC dress and shiny black heels. Then I grabbed out 2 leather belts, 2 zipties, the ball gag, and a wide leather belt.
I placed a towel under the thick plastic chair, just incase the diaper leaked or things went wrong. Once the chair was ready I gagged myself and then sat down. The very moment I sat down I could feel the unsettling urge to spill everything in my ass, however I managed to avoid doing that and continued with my bondage.
I strapped my ankles to the chair legs using the leather belts. Following that i fastened the wide leather belt around my stomach, so that my torso was anchored to the backrest. It was critical that my stomach belt wasn't too tight, as I didn't want any unnecessary pressure with so much water resting inside of me.
Next came my wrists. Using my right hand I tightly ziptied my left wrist to the left armrest of the chair. Then I slipped my right wrist into a loop that I had created around the right armrest, and pulled it closed.
I was now completely stuck to that chair... completely fucked If I couldn't contain all of my liquids. And boy it was difficult trying to hold it all in while setting up the bondage.
As time passed I tested my restraints, hoping there may be a chance of escaping this situation that I was now starting to regret. However my binds were simply too tight and I wasn't strong enough to break them, which really sucked. The urge to spill everything was coming and going in very intense waves. I fought the urge more than several times to the best of my ability, hoping to the gods that I wouldn't make a mess.
Fuck, what if it comes pouring out, and Mistress walks in here and smells it? I thought to myself.
She is going to be really disgusted and unhappy with me if she finds out I lost all control. I'm not sure I can tolerate feeling so ashamed off myself. This has the potential to be really fucked up.
I was worried.
After more time had passed the urgent need to spill everything had finally passed and I could finally start to relax a little bit. But then boredom set in, and I found myself listening to any kind of noise that I could. I listened to the faint creaking and cracking sounds of the floor boards in the hallway, to the cars passing by in the distance, and to the faint voice of Mistress talking with her daughter in the living room.
I became so bored that I tested my restraints once again, over and over until I felt defeated. It was at this point I started to get aroused. The feeling of being trapped while she is out there walking around freely turns me on. However it wasn't the only thing I was feeling.
Soon enough I started having dire urges to spill again, thanks to all the struggling. And thats when I heard the sound of old floor boards creaking, getting louder and louder as someone in the house was walking down the hallway.
Dear god I hope it's not Mistress, I though to myself. This isn't a good time for her to come in. I hope it's someone else just going about their business. However my hopes were soon shattered when I saw the bedroom door open slowly as Mistress walked in.
She approached me immediately and stared down at me, straight in the eyes.
"Have you shit yourself?" she asked.
I simply shook my head, trying to avoid eye contact with her as I was already embarrassed about the situation to begin with. At that point she started rubbing my nipples with her fingers, through the plastic dress that hugged my skin. The sensation felt amazing and I could feel myself growing hard inside my diaper as a result.
Again, she loves teasing me. And I love it when she does this, but I was worried that I would lose control of my bowels and disappoint her. I know she would not be pleased with me.
After the teasing had finally stopped I felt relieved to have avoided an accident. However I soon felt her hand pressing on my stomach and began to internally panic once more.
Is she trying to make me shit myself?
Next thing I knew she was sliding my shoulder straps down. Pulling my shiny dress down with them to gain access to my nipples, to which she attached the bloody clover clamps. These things have been a struggle at the best of times, mainly with pain management, but this time they were a large concern due to the liquid problem still present inside of me.
She then looked me dead in the eye with a serious look on her face, as she pulled at the clamps, while pressing her foot into my abdomen.
Fuck, I think she is trying!
What the actual hell is going through her head?
I moaned in protest through my gag, but it was no use. She just ignored my plea and continued what she was doing, regardless of how I felt about it.
I still managed not to spill though.
She tugged on them several times for her own amusement. Then started rubbing my diaper with her hand in an effort to get me hard. And guess what? It worked.
After some more rubbing came some more tugging of the clamps. Harder and harder until I felt like my nipples were going to be ripped off my chest. The pain was great and I was just barely keeping my bowels from creating complete chaos.
She then pulled at the clamps and held serious tension on them for a while, which finally undid my bowels!
The second she let go of the clamps I could feel my nipples painfully snap back to my chest, as a rush of water was felt abruptly leaving my ass, and rapidly filling my diaper.
Oh dear god, its happening! I thought to myself with overwhelming shame.
I could then feel it sitting in my diaper, and the sensation was truly horrible. In that moment I felt so disgusted, and awfully disappointed with myself. I knew it was a risk, but was it really worth it?
A slight odor started to emit from my diaper, and it was at that point I finally felt like I was about to be set free. I thought the moment Mistress smells it she will surely let me out to clean this up. She wont want to touch me any further.
However she didn't seem to notice what had happened. She couldn't even smell it, which was amazing. But I still needed to let her know somehow.
In my best efforts, through my ball gag I managed to say, "I just shat myself".
Even though my speech was almost inconceivable, she got the message straight away.
"You just shat yourself?" She asked.
I nodded my head in shame, while staring down at the floor.
"Well that's too bad," she said, as she plugged in the magic wand and held it firmly against my diaper.
I moaned and shook my head in protest, but it was no use. This sick, sadistic woman was still teasing me despite the incredible mess that just occurred.
"Do you want to cum?" She asked.
"No," I said as best I could.
"Are you sure?"
I let out another moan and tried to speak again through the gag. That damn gag.
"I don't want to cum in my own shit," I said.
"Aww, that's too bad", she said as she turned up the wand and continued.
This time I really shook my head hard, and moaned loudly in protest. But all I got in return was a wicked smirk on her face as she turned the wand up even higher.
Eventually I had a massive orgasm that seemed to have lasted ages. It was fucking incredible!
She finally turned off the wand and decided to release me from the chair at that point. No words were spoken once I was free, and no cuddles were given to me because I insisted on using the bathroom. Cleaning up this mess was my number one priority.
When everything was cleaned up and taken care of, I went to find Mistress in the sunroom, having a cigarette.
I sat down to join her, and we started talking about the session. Specifically why she decided to push me so far and make me shit myself.
She said, "It was a risk... a challenge, and I wanted to challenge you".
"I wanted to see how much you could take," she continued.
I simply looked at her with a surprised expression on my face.
"I really wanted an orgasm, like always, but I really didn’t want to cum in my own shit."
"I know, but you didn't safeword," she said while holding another grin on her face.
At that moment I just smiled and said, "I love you."
"I love you too," she replied.
"We are really fucked up people now though, you realize that right?"
I love self bondage, for those of you who don't know, I love getting myself into stupid predicaments, and exposing myself helplessly to my partner. Because once I'm bound, she can do anything she likes to me, and sometimes she likes to really push me.
This time however, we both went too far... and I fucking loved it!
My Mistress doesn't tie me up terribly often, as she likes to save her creative ideas and energy for the big sessions we have. In the moment she is an outstanding Dominant that you wouldn't dare look twice at. But that's not her style every day of course.
So when I'm feeling randomly submissive (and a little adventurous) I will tie myself, and leave my fate in her hands. She may choose to play with me, or simply ignore me all together. All depending on how she's feeling that day. Though she does like to tease me fairly often, knowing that I can't stop her.
On this particular night she was pre-occupied with decorating her nails, while I was extremely amorous and ready to go. So naturally I decided I would self bind like usual to satisfy my urges. But the real question was how to make it interesting and new? I wanted to do something that I had never done before.
After sitting around thinking for a while it suddenly struck me. What if I gave myself a huge enema and tied myself to a chair in our bedroom. It might be an interesting challenge to see how long I can stop myself from spilling it. I thought to myself.
The only issue is that it may create a huge unwanted mess, so I decided a diaper would be a good idea just incase it all goes south (literally).
And just to be clear, I don't have a scat fetish, and I never want to see it. I just like heavy degradation. I know some people are into it, but it's not my cup of tea personally.
I told my partner what I was doing so that she knew the risk if she tried playing with me. And quite frankly I didn't expect her to touch me on this occasion because she hates everything dirty and messy, including watersports, unless she's the one pissing on me to show Dominance. Anyhow, I let her know that I had just inserted over a litre of water into my ass and that I was about to self bind. Her reply was simply, "Have fun".
I then proceeded to head into the bedroom where I started to get myself ready. I stripped naked and put a diaper on, followed by my purple PVC dress and shiny black heels. Then I grabbed out 2 leather belts, 2 zipties, the ball gag, and a wide leather belt.
I placed a towel under the thick plastic chair, just incase the diaper leaked or things went wrong. Once the chair was ready I gagged myself and then sat down. The very moment I sat down I could feel the unsettling urge to spill everything in my ass, however I managed to avoid doing that and continued with my bondage.
I strapped my ankles to the chair legs using the leather belts. Following that i fastened the wide leather belt around my stomach, so that my torso was anchored to the backrest. It was critical that my stomach belt wasn't too tight, as I didn't want any unnecessary pressure with so much water resting inside of me.
Next came my wrists. Using my right hand I tightly ziptied my left wrist to the left armrest of the chair. Then I slipped my right wrist into a loop that I had created around the right armrest, and pulled it closed.
I was now completely stuck to that chair... completely fucked If I couldn't contain all of my liquids. And boy it was difficult trying to hold it all in while setting up the bondage.
As time passed I tested my restraints, hoping there may be a chance of escaping this situation that I was now starting to regret. However my binds were simply too tight and I wasn't strong enough to break them, which really sucked. The urge to spill everything was coming and going in very intense waves. I fought the urge more than several times to the best of my ability, hoping to the gods that I wouldn't make a mess.
Fuck, what if it comes pouring out, and Mistress walks in here and smells it? I thought to myself.
She is going to be really disgusted and unhappy with me if she finds out I lost all control. I'm not sure I can tolerate feeling so ashamed off myself. This has the potential to be really fucked up.
I was worried.
After more time had passed the urgent need to spill everything had finally passed and I could finally start to relax a little bit. But then boredom set in, and I found myself listening to any kind of noise that I could. I listened to the faint creaking and cracking sounds of the floor boards in the hallway, to the cars passing by in the distance, and to the faint voice of Mistress talking with her daughter in the living room.
I became so bored that I tested my restraints once again, over and over until I felt defeated. It was at this point I started to get aroused. The feeling of being trapped while she is out there walking around freely turns me on. However it wasn't the only thing I was feeling.
Soon enough I started having dire urges to spill again, thanks to all the struggling. And thats when I heard the sound of old floor boards creaking, getting louder and louder as someone in the house was walking down the hallway.
Dear god I hope it's not Mistress, I though to myself. This isn't a good time for her to come in. I hope it's someone else just going about their business. However my hopes were soon shattered when I saw the bedroom door open slowly as Mistress walked in.
She approached me immediately and stared down at me, straight in the eyes.
"Have you shit yourself?" she asked.
I simply shook my head, trying to avoid eye contact with her as I was already embarrassed about the situation to begin with. At that point she started rubbing my nipples with her fingers, through the plastic dress that hugged my skin. The sensation felt amazing and I could feel myself growing hard inside my diaper as a result.
Again, she loves teasing me. And I love it when she does this, but I was worried that I would lose control of my bowels and disappoint her. I know she would not be pleased with me.
After the teasing had finally stopped I felt relieved to have avoided an accident. However I soon felt her hand pressing on my stomach and began to internally panic once more.
Is she trying to make me shit myself?
Next thing I knew she was sliding my shoulder straps down. Pulling my shiny dress down with them to gain access to my nipples, to which she attached the bloody clover clamps. These things have been a struggle at the best of times, mainly with pain management, but this time they were a large concern due to the liquid problem still present inside of me.
She then looked me dead in the eye with a serious look on her face, as she pulled at the clamps, while pressing her foot into my abdomen.
Fuck, I think she is trying!
What the actual hell is going through her head?
I moaned in protest through my gag, but it was no use. She just ignored my plea and continued what she was doing, regardless of how I felt about it.
I still managed not to spill though.
She tugged on them several times for her own amusement. Then started rubbing my diaper with her hand in an effort to get me hard. And guess what? It worked.
After some more rubbing came some more tugging of the clamps. Harder and harder until I felt like my nipples were going to be ripped off my chest. The pain was great and I was just barely keeping my bowels from creating complete chaos.
She then pulled at the clamps and held serious tension on them for a while, which finally undid my bowels!
The second she let go of the clamps I could feel my nipples painfully snap back to my chest, as a rush of water was felt abruptly leaving my ass, and rapidly filling my diaper.
Oh dear god, its happening! I thought to myself with overwhelming shame.
I could then feel it sitting in my diaper, and the sensation was truly horrible. In that moment I felt so disgusted, and awfully disappointed with myself. I knew it was a risk, but was it really worth it?
A slight odor started to emit from my diaper, and it was at that point I finally felt like I was about to be set free. I thought the moment Mistress smells it she will surely let me out to clean this up. She wont want to touch me any further.
However she didn't seem to notice what had happened. She couldn't even smell it, which was amazing. But I still needed to let her know somehow.
In my best efforts, through my ball gag I managed to say, "I just shat myself".
Even though my speech was almost inconceivable, she got the message straight away.
"You just shat yourself?" She asked.
I nodded my head in shame, while staring down at the floor.
"Well that's too bad," she said, as she plugged in the magic wand and held it firmly against my diaper.
I moaned and shook my head in protest, but it was no use. This sick, sadistic woman was still teasing me despite the incredible mess that just occurred.
"Do you want to cum?" She asked.
"No," I said as best I could.
"Are you sure?"
I let out another moan and tried to speak again through the gag. That damn gag.
"I don't want to cum in my own shit," I said.
"Aww, that's too bad", she said as she turned up the wand and continued.
This time I really shook my head hard, and moaned loudly in protest. But all I got in return was a wicked smirk on her face as she turned the wand up even higher.
Eventually I had a massive orgasm that seemed to have lasted ages. It was fucking incredible!
She finally turned off the wand and decided to release me from the chair at that point. No words were spoken once I was free, and no cuddles were given to me because I insisted on using the bathroom. Cleaning up this mess was my number one priority.
When everything was cleaned up and taken care of, I went to find Mistress in the sunroom, having a cigarette.
I sat down to join her, and we started talking about the session. Specifically why she decided to push me so far and make me shit myself.
She said, "It was a risk... a challenge, and I wanted to challenge you".
"I wanted to see how much you could take," she continued.
I simply looked at her with a surprised expression on my face.
"I really wanted an orgasm, like always, but I really didn’t want to cum in my own shit."
"I know, but you didn't safeword," she said while holding another grin on her face.
At that moment I just smiled and said, "I love you."
"I love you too," she replied.
"We are really fucked up people now though, you realize that right?"